In the process of the Giant Big Aventure concerning leaving tenure track jobs and moving to Albuquerque, we bought a house there. And since we’re not actually going to be there till next year, we found tenants. And they are lovely tenants. We haven’t met them but we know they are lovely tenants because they text message us Sane Things like where is the circuit breaker and is there a side door key. (Answers: 1) we don’t know. 2) No.)
It’s not easy, getting used to a new house. And they locked their cat in the bedroom by mistake, cause who would have thought that the inner doors to the house would just LOCK if you closed them? Not us. but the folks who remodeled the house with all those locks were law enforcement people. Hence the locks. And the security system. And the gun safe. None of which features we’ll be using. Except for the gun safe, which we can put our wills in.
And these tenants haven’t lived in the high desert before. They’re from Seattle. So I figure it’s pretty exciting, being in Albuquerque and all. And that it would be pretty exciting anyway. On account of the red and green chile and the excellent sunsets. I emailed them with lots of suggestions about where to eat and what to go see.
But! Lucky newbies! They got to arrive in Albuquerque just in time for the worst storm of the century! (Not just the century we’re in, which is sorta new, but really the last one, too, which was longer and took up all 100 years allotted to it.)
Well, that was too exciting, really. Sorry about that.
The house weathered the storm ok, though, and we didn’t lose any trees (they were down all over Albuquerque; there were 14 down at the university alone), though it turns out that the garbage disposal backs up during floods, and if torrential amounts of rain are battered against the balcony door at 90 miles an hour, the carpet gets wet.
Well, it’s the desert. It’ll dry up soon.
But the latest wrinkle is that somebody left, on the side doorstep, a photo of four charming little children, and a couple of keys labeled “warehouse.” So the tenants took a picture and texted us.
What warehouse? What are we keeping in it? And who are these children?
We don’t know.
And given the high state of security precautions installed in the house, we aren’t sure we WANT to know.
Welcome to Albuquerque, Lovely Tenants! Don’t forget to specify red or green chile, when you get to the restaurant; please keep all your guns in the gun safe; prop open all the doors, or leave the keys in them; don’t bother preparing for the next 90 mph wind with torrential rain, cause really we only get them once every 100 years; stick all the stuff left on the doorstep in a box, and we’ll sort it out next year.